black and white thinking.

Since I changed my plans for the future and cancelled my study program in media design, I thought a lot about this topic: What to study, what to do, where to go. Thought the past 3 years about this tbh. And that‘s totally a normal thing after finishing school, as pretty much everyone around me had those thoughts once.

Some people reacted kinda surprised, when I told them about quitting my bachelor in media design and starting to study psychology. Even I surprised myself with my own thoughts. ‘Cause I always dreamt of becoming a filmmaker. I identified with this my whole life.

And I still do.

That’s the thing.
I had struggles accepting the fact, that I want to learn something new. I was afraid, because I thought that I would abandon a huge part of myself.

As if I can only the be

the one OR the other.

Creative OR analytical.

Practical OR theoretical.

A filmmaker OR a psychologist.

As if I had to decide between two different identities.

People tend to stereotypical thinking, because it makes them feel safer. Don’t get me wrong, I do the same. Unconsciously. It’s an automatism. But I try to be conscious about it.

Most people know me more as a “Creative one.“ But what if I am not just a so called “Creative“? What if I am just doing what feels right & good in my eyes. From my perspective.
For instance, I can‘t draw, have no clue about design theory, art history and all that fancy stuff you think about when you hear the word „Creative“.
But yes, what I may have is a feeling of translating my emotions into (motion) pictures. In my own way. With premiere pro as my little helper. (If it’s not crashing for once.)

The point is: People know you. But only parts of you. They only know the „you“ you decided to put out there. You are the only one who knows your essence. You are complex. Don’t feel the need to put a label on your being. And there will always be expectations of how you have to be. By others or by yourself.
So whether I am some sort of a “Creative“ or not, that‘s not defining me, as everyone has their own definition and labels.

Create your own Reality.